ADHD Superpowers – Talk 2 Executive Functioning with ADHD

ADHD Superpowers: Executive Functioning

Part 2 in the ADHD series with Paediatric Occupational Therapist, Emma Wijnberg

If the first talk in this series helped you understand the ADHD brain, this second session is where that science comes to life.

In “ADHD in Action”, we zoom in on the behaviours you see every day — the distractibility, the procrastination, the meltdowns, the “backchat”, the risk-taking, the inconsistent performance — and we connect them directly to what’s happening in the child’s brain and body.

Because once you understand the why, your whole response can change.

From “They Won’t” to “They Can’t (Yet)”

Children with ADHD don’t wake up in the morning planning to forget their homework, blurt out in class, annoy their siblings, or lose their temper over small things. Just as a child with a language delay doesn’t choose to battle with conversation, a child with ADHD doesn’t choose to battle with self-control, focus, and follow-through.

In this talk, we unpack:

• Dopamine, reward and motivation – why ADHD brains crave stimulation, struggle with delayed gratification, and seem able to focus beautifully on Minecraft or LEGO, but fall apart over worksheets, chores and “boring” tasks.

• Reward Deficiency Syndrome – why “try harder” doesn’t work, and why many children (and later teens) drift towards thrill, risk, and intense experiences to feel “just right” in their own brains.

• Executive functioning – the brain’s “director” behind planning, organisation, working memory, flexible thinking, impulse control and emotional regulation. We explore how ADHD turns everyday tasks into uphill climbs, even when the child knows exactly what to do.

• The real nature of ADHD behaviours – attention problems, distractibility, inconsistency, difficulty following instructions, impulsivity, “bad timing”, and hyperactivity/hyper-reactivity – seen through a compassionate, neurological lens rather than a moral one.

You’ll hear phrases like:

“ADHD is not a problem with knowing what to do; it’s a problem with doing what you already know.”

…and we’ll unpack exactly what that means for home, school, friendships and self-esteem.

Turning Complexity into Compassion

Using clear metaphors and everyday examples, we’ll look at:

• Why your child can sometimes work brilliantly and at other times “does nothing at all”.

• Why removing all stimulation to “help them focus” often backfires — and how adding structured stimulation(music, movement, novelty, breaks) can actually improve concentration.

• Why ADHD children are often labelled “lazy”, “unmotivated”, “rude” or “undisciplined” — and how outdated those labels are when we factor in dopamine differences and executive function delays.

• How struggles with delayed gratification, waiting, queuing, and “holding back” are rooted in neurology, not character flaws.

We explore attention, impulsivity and activity levels as brain-based differences, not failures of willpower. This shift alone can dramatically soften how parents, teachers and even peers respond to the child.

Executive Function: The Invisible Workload

We’ll break down key executive functioning (EF) skills and how they relate to ADHD, including:

• Working memory – holding information in mind long enough to use it (e.g. “Go upstairs, get your shoes, bring your book, and put your bag by the door”).

• Cognitive flexibility – being able to shift gears when the plan changes, when the routine is disrupted, or when there’s a new way of doing things.

• Inhibitory control – resisting impulses, pausing before acting/speaking, staying seated, and keeping hands, feet and words “under control”.

• Emotional control & movement control – why feelings get “too big”, why restlessness shows up at exactly the wrong moment, and why calm doesn’t come easily.

We then link these directly to what you see at home and school: unfinished work, messy rooms, difficulty following multi-step instructions, talking out of turn, rushing through tasks, constant movement, rule-breaking, boredom with anything repetitive, and inconsistent academic performance.

Most importantly, we’ll talk about how EF skills unfold over time, and why ADHD means these skills often lag behind peers — especially in the preteen and teen years, when life gets more complicated but the brain systems for self-management are still catching up.

Practical Support: External Brakes for a Ferrari Brain

This talk is not just theory. You’ll leave with concrete, realistic strategies to support the child in front of you, such as:

• How to increase stimulation in a helpful way during boring tasks (novelty, movement, music, short sprints of work, immediate rewards).

• How to break tasks into smaller, more manageable steps so the brain can “stay in the game”.

• How to use external executive function supports – visual schedules, checklists, timers, reminders, routines and scaffolding – without turning into a nag.

• How to set expectations and boundaries that recognise neurological limitations while still building responsibility and resilience.

• How to spot when impulsivity and poor self-control are putting your child at higher risk (accidents, risky behaviour, money problems, substance use in the teen years), and what early support can help.

We’ll also talk about how these supports need to grow and change from early primary school into adolescence, and why kids with ADHD often need “training wheels” for longer than their peers — not because they are incapable, but because their brain’s “director” is still in development.

Remember the Superpowers

Amid all the challenges, we will not lose sight of the bright side of ADHD.

We’ll explore the strengths often seen in ADHD:

• Hyperfocus – the ability to dive deeply into a topic or task and produce incredible work when the brain is engaged.

• Creativity & problem-solving – seeing connections others miss, thinking laterally, and approaching life from a fresh angle.

• Resilience – the quiet toughness that comes from facing and overcoming challenges daily.

• Humour, empathy, big-heartedness & social warmth – the way many ADHD children root for the underdog, feel deeply for others, and bring life and laughter into a room.

• Spontaneity, courage and energy – qualities that, when channelled well, can make for extraordinary adults, athletes, entrepreneurs, artists and change-makers.

When we understand both the vulnerabilities and the gifts, we can guide our children not just to survive school, but to build a life that honours who they are.

Who This Talk Is For

This session is ideal for:

• Parents who are tired, worried, and longing to understand their child’s behaviour on a deeper level.

• Teachers who see ADHD in their classrooms every day and want more than generic strategies.

• Therapists and students who want a practical, brain-based way to explain ADHD to families.

• Tweens/teens with ADHD (if they choose to join you) who want to understand themselves with more compassion.

It builds on Talk 1 (“Understanding ADHD: A Science-Based, Heart-Led Guide”), but can also stand alone if you’re joining the series here.

If you’d like to continue learning after the live session, this talk forms part of my full online ADHD course on the Little Lives website, where we unpack these ideas step by step and translate them into everyday practice.

When we understand the story behind a child’s behaviour, everything changes — for them, and for us.
This talk is about learning to see that story clearly, and responding with insight, structure and deep compassion.